On resisting your temptations

This morning, I went outside to do my routine. My routine consists of a little bit of six painful activities: sitting, standing, walking, running, squatting, and stairs. For the last two months I have been slowly increasing how much of each I do: one more stair, 15 seconds more walking, like that. This week I had a big flare up of knee pain, so today I could only manage less than half of what I’ve been doing, and even that gave me pain.

It left me frustrated and angry. I came back into the house and just wanted to escape. I scooped brownie ice cream into a mug, pulled a jug of orange juice from the fridge, and sat down in despair to watch Netflix.

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What to do when you feel awful

No matter how good you become at managing your pain, no matter how much work you put into loving your life, there will probably come a time when you feel absolutely awful and nothing you do lightens your mood. You have a major flare-up, or two or three, and all of life feels dark, hostile, and meaningless. It really does feel that this is the end, that all you have to look forward to is more awfulness, anger, fear, rage, despair, and/or depression, until you die. That’s the story, anyway!

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